The Best Talks at the BlackHat Conference Weren’t Even at BlackHat

 

 

black hat

black hat

Black Hat USA is the no-holds-or-hacks-barred annual conference that brings together some of the biggest names in infosec with some of the biggest names in hacking. But not all, because some are still hung over from HOPE. It’s just wrapped up in Vegas at the swanky Mandalay Bay hotel, giving its shell-shocked participants barely enough time to stagger down the strip to Defcon, the bastard outlaw step-nephew of the comparatively straightlaced and corporate Black Hat conference. Think of Defcon as Tank Girl, and Black Hat as Laura Holt from Remington Steele.

God, I’m old.

What were the best talks at Black Hat this year? I couldn’t tell you. But I can tell you what are the best talks that weren’t at Black Hat this year. Thanks to the hashtag #MyWithdrawnBlackHatTalk on Twitter, we can all enjoy what might have been.

Even if we need to Wikipedia half of the jokes.

The hashtag idea arose during an August 6 conversation between Matt Blaze (“Scientist, safecracker. 140 is the new 1536.”) and Steven Bellovin, a computer science professor at Columbia. Once the idea was birthed, it hit the ground running, placenta trailing in the wind.

Behold our completely arbitrarily-chosen “Best of” roundup:

And finally, one that’s probably actually real.

 

Featured Image of Black Hat via Arbyreed on Flickr

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Categories: Black Hat, Black Hat USA, Cyber, Cyberpunk, Defcon, Hackers, Humor, Malware, Media, NSA, Security, Social Media, Surveillance, Weird

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