Breaking news: Michael J Fox arrested for insider sports betting

Definitely the most interesting criminal case before the courts today. In related news, Michael J. Fox appears immune to ageing. Bonus points for the crack at the Segway.

Stubhill News

MJF

Los Angeles—Michael J Fox was arrested Wednesday morning in relation to insider sports betting on DraftKings.

Fox aroused suspicion after achieving a statistically-impossible, perfect record on the site under the username NoChicken.

Authorities found an unusually worn copy of a sports almanac which was just recently printed and which has markings cataloging winning bets Fox has placed since the late 80’s.

“The operating theory is that the Back to the Future films were really documentaries from an original, prime timeline,” said NASA astrophysicist Barry Manilow. “The implications are heavy. It is suspected that we are living in an alternate 2015, as there are no flying cars and there are only four Jaws movies. We can only assume that we are forever stunted as a society. The amount of lives lost due to our lack of progress in technology and medicine is unfathomable. Worst of all, instead of hoverboards, this sad reality is limited to the Swagway.”

“We suspect…

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Categories: Crime, Gambling, Gaming, Hackers, Humor, Movies

9 replies

  1. Lmao very good 😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. If you enjoyed this, then please visit Stubhill News for more of our material.

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  3. I don’t appreciate a headline in my email saying: BREAKING NEWS: MICHAEL J FOX ARRESTED FOR INSIDER SPORTS BETTING. I was under the assumption that the Cryptosphere posted stories and news items that were real and not a stupid joke about Back to the Future 2. Did not even find it a funny joke, making me wonder why this was posted now and if there is any significance.

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    • Easy: We were looking for a post to celebrate Back to the Future Day, and this literally was the best one out there. I read plenty. And we thought it was funny, so we shared it. You’re not obligated to subscribe, or to enjoy every single story.

      You’re welcome for all the stories you presumably DID enjoy.

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  4. Wow, David went full retard on this post…..”I don’t appreciate seeing blah blah……” Good lord ! I think most people with a working brain would see the link between the post and the date / film reference. Poor man must live a very sheltered life indeed. I’m assuming that wasn’t the first The Cryptosphere post he’s read, seeing as it arrived by email [thus he’s subbed]. One of life’s whinging bastards obviously…..fgt….
    No this Comment had no relevance to the actual post outright,it’s a Comment on a Comment, sorry doe….😬

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  5. -le sigh-
    I’m assuming David is subbed as he got The Cryptosphere via email. No need to go full retard doe David…., I’m sure most people connected the date with the post with the film reference and didn’t need further instruction on the factual content. Some people just like to whine about irrelevant stuff clearly
    FAGITUS TOTALIS…

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