Today we present a charming and informative Defcon talk from Gene Bransfield of Tenacity Solutions. The subject is the very straightforward “Weaponizing Your Pets” which is something I’m sure we have all wished to do from time to time, making Snowball and Phidough work for their kibble like honest beasts. If you’re wondering where the term “War Kitteh” originates, it hearkens back to war driving and war chalking; in the early days (before pet weaponization) people had to toodle around on their own checking for wifi as they worked their way down city sidewalks, marking particularly rich and unprotected sources, sometimes digitally, sometimes with actual chalk like some goddam hobo or something. And everyone knows what “Kitteh” means because the internet is made of cats.
The talk includes interesting background on actual working military animals including a real navy seal and the fabled Acoustic Kitty of the CIA, who met a tragic end at the hands of a still-unidentified hit-and-run artiste.
To weaponize your pet you will need some basic equipment: a pet, for starters.
For War Kitteh you require:
- A collar or harness.
- GPS tracking device.
- A wireless sniffer/scanner, to identify when the pet is within range of a source of wifi.
The Denial of Service Dog is a volunteer dog you can take anywhere you want to be but don’t want television to be. When the technology is deployed, it replaces whatever’s playing on TV with those internet golden oldies the Rickroll and everyone’s secret favorite, Peanut Butter Jelly Time. For this you need:
- Wifi Pineapple
- Doggie Backpack/saddlebags
- Denial of Service Dog patches
Image via Mo on Flickr